Give Me a Week

Posted on July 29th, 2011

The whole “day by day” attitude that I have had just isn’t working for me. Days are simply too short and they end too quickly. Focusing on each day means that nights are rotten. I simply can’t sleep and find myself pacing around at all sorts or weird hours. Even the dog is telling me to calm down and get some sleep.

So now, I am officially announcing that we are going to have a great week. That’s right — from right now, we know that this coming week will be a really good one. It will be good and it will be normal. Let’s make it a week and a day so we can throw in next Shabbat as well, o.k?

First, Stella has been feeling better. The chemo commandos must be doing their job and knocking the stuffing out of the evil cancer troops. The last couple days have been really nice and aside from sleeping a lot (which is not the worst side effect if you think about it,) Stella seems in pretty good shape. Her hair has not fallen out and she has not turned blue. She even had a pint of Ben and Jerry’s, melted of course since she can’t eat cold food. She still looks fantastic and when she send me that smile of hers, I feel that everything will be all right.

I have thought a lot about the difference between denial and hope. Denial means that you simply refuse to understand the situation you are in. You may listen to the Doctor, but you don’t hear. Denial is not a terrible thing if the road is rough, but I don’t believe it’s that healthy.

Hope is something else entirely. Hope means that even though you understand that the road ahead will be rough, you still believe that one day, everything will be normal again. There are so many examples of people “beating the odds” doing all sorts of things that you have to realize how little cancer statistics mean if you are one person.

People who been given tiny chances live and those who have been given great odds die. So if you are an Oncologist with one hundred patients, the statistics may be very important to you. But if you are just one person — they don’t necessarily mean anything. So not obsessing about numbers is not denial, it’s hope.

Why on Earth did Lance Armstrong believe that he could win the Tour de France just three years after getting cancer? One word: Hope.

So the word for the week is hope and what a week it will be. We have huge plans. We are going to go for walks with the dog, and go back to work, and cook meals for ourselves. Our kids will be returning from California and we will have pizza and go the mall. We will play tennis on the Wii and Bannanagrams on the table.

We do not have chemo scheduled or blood tests or meetings with Doctors. I’m not in denial, I know that we will have lots of all those things in the future. But I just want one week to have fun and be happy and squeeze all we can out of seven or eight days. I’m not going to cry in shul, but I will sleep and run like a normal (well, normal for me) person.

And who know, if this week works, maybe we can have another.

And another.

And another.

That’s what I mean by Hope.

Shabbat Shalom and have a great week.

 

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Comments

  1. Sari says:

    love it. wishing you a great week+1…and more. and by the way, when stella goes back to work this week, tell her to look out for mord – he’ll need a smidge of gentleness when he gets in the dentist chair. :)

  2. Sharon A says:

    Hope you have a Shabat Shalom and hope it is followed by a really good week.

  3. Shellie says:

    Last year I read this article and it made a deep impression on me. I think it is part of your positive attitude. I hope it can give you some food for thought as well. Wishing you a Shabbat Shalom and good thoughts.
    Shellie

    http://www.prevention.com/health/health/healthy-living/the-long-view-of-a-healthy-life/article/bf4c6770b98b5210VgnVCM10000030281eac____/5

  4. rutimizrachi says:

    Go for it! Attitude is everything. So saith Coach.

  5. Mark Ferneau says:

    Yarden & Stella – what a wonderful message for all of us. I’ll see your week of hope and raise you a month of positive attitude.

  6. Rev. Rocky Hankins says:

    Attitude, attitude, attitude! With the right attitude and hope your half way there.
    Rev. Rocky & Carol & Cameron…………….

  7. Carla says:

    So well said and so true. Holding you in my heart and thoughts.

    Love, Carla and Stan

  8. Rebekah says:

    Sounds great, Yarden. Shabbat Shalom and Gutte Wochen, SHAVUA TOV.

  9. Iris says:

    Baily is wondering in that photo, hey, who ate the last of the Ben and Jerry’s?
    Have a great Shabbos.

  10. Larry Rosen says:

    Stella and Yarden – I must say that Mark Ferneu’s message is just what I wanted to say. Shabbat Shalom – and SHAVUA Tov & Shalom!!!

  11. Paul Goldstein says:

    We wish you a Beautiful Shabbos and an excellent week; from both of us to both of you.
    Jeri & Paul

  12. Phyllis and Harold says:

    We hope you enjoy this Shabbos more than last, and that next Shabbos is better. Thanks for the inspiring note. Thinking of you everyday.

  13. Samara says:

    Shoshana loves the picture of Bailey (even though she’s petrified of him). Thinking of you and admiring your courage. HOPING and PRAYING for you.

    Shavua Tov,
    Samara

  14. Sharon Baratt says:

    Shavua Tov!!!! What a wonderful mindset for the coming weeks and months!!!

    Love always to all,
    Sharon

  15. Seitz Family says:

    Lots of Love frum Italy, from Noam and zefi (my family also send over lots of love, and buckets smiles – my mum says smiles are the best accessories in the world: you can add them to any outfit and never go out if fashion!)