Posts Tagged ‘post’

Cool Down

Thursday, July 12th, 2012

After a particularly tough run or ride, it is highly recommended that you do what is called a “cool-down.” It means you jog around for about 10 minutes and try to let your body get over the torture you have just put it through.

I hate cool-downs. When I run, I like to hit the finish with nothing left in the tank. When I finish running, I want to crawl into a nice bowl of soup, close my eyes, and open my mouth. The last thing on Earth I want to do is continue running, even though it’s at a nice and “easy” pace. Heck, after a long run, driving can be hard, let alone running a bit more.

So Stella and I continue on our incredible journey and I’d say we have been in the “cool-down” phase. We have finished the really, really hard part, but still have to have scans and doctor’s appointments and so forth that we would just as well skip.

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Why I smell like a Pomegranate

Monday, March 5th, 2012

I know, I know.

I have not written in a couple of weeks.

Actually, that’s not true. I have written a number of posts since Stella got home from the hospital last month.

It’s just that right before I am about to hit the “send” button, I re-read the posts and decided not to send them. They were not the right “message” that I wanted to share.

It’s not a big deal. I don’t think that any of you would find what I wrote surprising.

For example, I wrote (and then deleted) a post called “Unexpected Pain.”

Essentially it was about how we had gone to bed one night and the next morning found ourselves on the way to the Emergency Room (and a week-long hospital stay) because Stella had very serious pain that seemed to come out of nowhere and surprised us both.

But the post was also about how I had gone to the wedding of a close friend’s daughter. Stella was not feeling well enough to attend so I went solo. Everything was fine until one moment, while watching the ceremony when I felt a sudden emotional pain well up out of nowhere. I guess being in an emotional environment like that without my wife just triggered something. I had to excuse myself  run away and sit outside for awhile trying to get a grip. Which, of course, I did and then could go hang out again with my friends.

See, no big deal, but not really worthy of a whole depressing blog post.

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Stella’s Army

Sunday, January 1st, 2012

Last night I lay in bed next to Stella watching the e-mails and comments come in from members of “Stella’s Army.” We were in the hospital and I was much relieved that the night staff did not try and throw me out of bed. I guess Israeli hospitals are different. When I asked someone if they were going to bring bedding and hospital pajamas for Stella, he pointed me in the direction of a closet and let me know that it is really self-service here (although they did not ask me to put in the IV.) On the other hand, I don’t know if I could have gotten away with crawling into the bed with Stella anywhere else, so all things considered, so far so good.

Around 2:00 AM, I considered getting up and writing a post. But I didn’t want to disturb Stella (not that she really needs sleep now!) Also, I was not sure exactly what I would write. So I just watched the e-mails and comments come in over my iPhone. And that’s when I realized what I wanted to write.

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Like This

Monday, October 31st, 2011

Go ahead and click “like” on Facebook, trust me on this one.

If you were to tell me six month ago, that my wife would have cancer, that it would not be curable, and that she would need nasty chemo treatments every three weeks, I would be miserable. But you know, everything is relative.

Tonight we celebrated that very news.

Let me explain.

The reason for my post a few weeks ago asking people to not ask too many questions was that we were seriously concerned that the results of the scan were not going to be good. In fact, statistically, the best that the scan should have showed was that the rate of growth of the cancer had slowed. Not really the best news you can hear.

So last night, we went to bed both dreading today. We would have the results of the scan plus a full day of chemo. Not exactly a “Yom Kef” if you know what I mean. When we entered the hospital, I felt we were waiting for the jury to pass a verdict, a verdict that was not going to be very nice.

So let me tell you what happened and why we are so happy. Please just keep in mind what I wrote in the begining of this post. We have won a major battle, but the war goes on.

When the Doctor saw me this morning, he came out of the office with both thumbs up. He told me that the scan results were “excellent.” Later, he showed us before and after pictures of Stella’s stomach. The image from a few months ago looked like Stella had swallowed a python. Basically, there was more tumor than stomach.

Today, the scan showed that the python had been replaced by a worm. In the words of the Oncologist, the difference was “dramatic” and that the cancer was “melting away.” When we asked if he had any expectations that the scan would be so good, he said he didn’t expect it at all, but he “dreamt”  it. Stella is responding to the chemo in an amazing fashion that does not go along with the nasty statistics.

(Short break for a virtual high-five.)

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Quarter after Two in the Morning

Monday, July 18th, 2011

I didn’t write a post today.

It’s not that I didn’t have something to say. There were a few things I was thinking of.

I could have written about going to the “chemo orientation” which is a bit like orientation to a summer camp. Except that there was no mention of horseback riding or canoeing. Instead, the camp activities included bouts of nausea, losing hair and the sense of taste and all sorts of other weird and nasty things that the chemo might cause.

Once again, I had to sit feeling totally helpless while I heard of all the horrible stuff that would happen to the woman I love.

But I can’t protect her from this horrible ordeal because this is what is needed to save her life. As a husband, you want to be strong and shield your wife from misery, but it just doesn’t work that way in this case.

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